What Does It Mean To Be A Fake Christian?
The summer heat drove me to take a shortcut home, and as I walked, eagerly thinking about my fan and possibly an ice cream, I realised this route would take me by my church. It’s always lovely to see it, even after attending for more than a year now. It’s like seeing another home, and with the newly installed pride flags waving in the evening breeze, it seemed especially welcoming. Reaching the corner, I saw a flash of white on the ground- a scrawl of chalk. A familiar site, especially on the promenade where I’ve noticed many colourful chalk drawings of hopscotch games and smiley faces. Yet as I grew closer, I realised this message lacked the joy of the others- a message of two words, 'fake christians'.
I took a picture and walked home, trying to understand why the simple phrase felt like it lodged unpleasantly in my chest. I am assuming it was a response to the open support of inclusivity, shown via the new pride flags by the church's entrance. Perhaps the one who wrote it, feels as if one cannot have a faith and also be a member of the LGBT community. Maybe have a faith themselves, it might explain the use of the word 'fake' to imply a 'real' Christian wouldn’t be so welcoming. Or perhaps they were just bored. I know there’s the advice often encouraged from childhood, ignore someone being rude and they’ll lose interest. But, I have to confess, I am not particularly good at letting things go.
The message, as short and simple as it was, carries an awful lot of weight. It implies any church who opens its doors to everyone- is wrong. It questions the faith and theology of those who stand against bigotry and discrimination. Unfortunately, it seems to do nothing other than perpetuate the ugly stereotype that all who identify as religious, are also all homophobic. The relationship between Christianity and homosexuality is often strained, yet this leaves those who find they carry both sides within them in an unenviable position. What can you do when your love and your faith seem to be at war? When members of both sides say you cannot embody both identities?
Sometimes, if you’re lucky, you can find a place where you are welcome. Where neither part of your identity needs to be hidden or changed, where there is no pressure to be someone you’re not. A place where you are loved for exactly who you are- without exception.
For me, that place was Worthing Baptist Church. Led by two ministers who have dealt with the backlash of registering the church to perform same-sex marriages, as well as their affirming views. Filled with a congregation who truly believes in unconditional love. Never before have I experienced such an open-handed welcome, or have been so embraced by a community. My first visit, I felt as if I’d arrived late to a meal, the spaces at table were occupied- yet another seat was found just for me. Over my time there, I’ve been lucky enough to see new faces, to be a part of those who hold out a hand and say, ‘you could belong here, if you wanted.'
Perhaps that’s why this little message stuck with me, moved me to write this article. It discounts the incredible work of so many who have stood up and said 'your faith and your identity don’t have to be at odds' who have fought for representation and positive change within religious communities. Yet, as someone else said, this message can be seen in a positive light. It means our affirming message is reaching people, it means Worthing Baptist Church is on the right track. Perhaps, if it’s being seen by those who disagree, it might also be seen for someone looking for a church. Maybe another person who feels lost, who has had negative experiences in the past, could see the message and know there is a space for them.
So what is being a Christian (fake or otherwise) about? For me anyway, it's just about love. It’s remembering that every single person reflects divinity and holds a spark of light within them. It’s trying to be gentle and kind- even when I’m tired or angry. It’s looking around and realising the inherent holiness of simply being alive in a beautiful, imperfect world. The gratitude I hold for my friends and my family, the joy I feel being part of a community, the pride I can hold in my church. It’s realising everything is spiritual, and there is always wonder to be found. It's being non-judgemental, and celebrating our differences while standing together. It's finally having the words to say I believe love, like God, is bigger than any box we can imagine.
To the person who wrote the words, 'fake christian' outside an affirming church, I hope faith brings you just as much joy as it does me. And I hope, one day, you might feel differently towards those who aren’t necessarily the same as you.
To anyone reading this who perhaps wants to be a part of a faith community but feels isolated because of their identity- know there is a place for you. Maybe at Worthing Baptist, maybe somewhere else. Just know that you don’t need to change or hide, you are loved.
With the unpredictable British weather, the message will likely be washed away soon in the rain.
It’ll be forgotten.
Yet Worthing Baptist Church will remain, and affirming Christians will continue to speak all over the world. LGBT individuals who seek a faith, will find one. And 'fake Christians' like me will keep finding joy in God, and will undoubtedly have a blast celebrating Pride!
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Riley Turner